I’ve been thinking a lot about borders, boundaries, and all things that contain, restrict, and wall things in.

We’re 4 days out from Christmas, and all our plans have been turned upside down due to restrictions. What we thought would happen last Friday has completely been altered this past weekend. Not only did the OFFICIAL announcement impact our lives, but we also received news that daughter number One has to self-isolate….until December 29th. This feels like a punch to the stomach.

As if we needed more punches this year.

This has been a year of feeling hemmed in, walled in, bound, not able to move freely. I know I am not alone in this. And now it looks like we will ride out this year in a way that only 2020 could bring.

Things will be simple, quiet, and very.much.contained.

However, in the midst of these really horrible, trying, rage-and-tears-inducing restrictions, I have tried (for sanity’s sake) to see the good - if any - that could come out of these trials.
[*Please Note - there are some of you who have really lost so much this year. This is not a post about making lemons out of lemonade when you’ve lost loved ones or memories with people that you can never have back. Your pain is real, and grief is not meant to be passed over quickly.]

But for many of us, the circumstances we are in are uncomfortable, frustrating, costly, but mostly just need to be “waited out”.

Borders and boundaries have always been traditionally used to mark the land. They show us whose land is whose, where one nation ends and another begins, what property is off limits and what is for public domain. Borders are necessary to help define people and places.

One of my favourite things about England are the stone walls that surround homes, fields, parks, land, manors, and the like. On a recent photoshoot in Loxley Commons, I couldn’t help but admire the stone walls that crept into the local fields we were walking alongside.

These walls are crumbling and are no doubt hundreds of years old - ancient reminders that the land we were traversing had boundaries that served the purposes of those who occupied it, as they do now.

There are other types of boundaries and restrictions that don’t have to do with territory. A football pitch has boundaries so players know the space that is used for the match. The rules of the game help to define how they play and what awards and penalties will be given to them. These are the kinds of boundaries that are “good” and are able to give football it’s brilliance.

So when it comes to my own life, I’ve tried to see the boundaries of this year from a different perspective - not just being told “NO!” (which no one ever wants to hear) - but perhaps a doorway, an offering into a different experience.

Because let’s face it, if we don’t try to look for the good, then we’re just going to feel crushed. So, right now with 4 days left until Christmas, I’m having to ask myself:

”What does this boundary ALLOW me to have that I don’t usually have? What does this restriction actually GIVE me that I wouldn’t have under normal circumstances?”
(Confession: these are not questions I WANT to be asking myself, but I am forcing myself to.)

Here’s a short list I came up with:
- I can develop better community with my neighbours because I’m not able to see family and friends that I would usually go to.
- I can be grateful for this extra, focused time with my husband and kids.
- I can see this as an adventure that we are all facing together and look for ways it can strengthen our bonds.
- I can learn to simplify and let go of the fluff. Sometimes less is more, and it’s alright that we’re not super busy and weighed down by the normal demands of life.
- I can think about who is more needy than I am and reach out with care and compassion.
- I can choose gratitude for what I have. This year has forced me to take stock of the gifts of family, friends, provision, and the simple things in life.

The borders and boundaries we have in life don’t always seem to be laced with comfort and happiness, but sometimes those boundaries are laced with goodness and fresh perspective that will enable us to live more grateful and more purpose-filled lives.

To take it a step further, we can ask ourselves what borders and boundaries have we been given, not just in this season, but in this lifetime? Some of the borders we have were not our choice, but what goodness lies in the lot that we’ve been given, or inherited? What treasures lies in the limitations and capacities with which we have to work and live?

This is what the first Christmas actually shows us. The most wondrous, history-changing moment was birthed in the confines of ancient Middle Eastern society. A peasant girl with no titles or exemptions or earthly comforts - someone who was limited by social status - was still given the opportunity to house and nurture the King of all kings.

So as we reflect on our own limitations in which we find ourselves, this is my hope for us…

May these borders and boundaries that are refining us, also begin to define us in new and unexpected ways. May we have fresh perspective to see the goodness that has been given to us even within these spaces that feel restricting and yes, even heart-wrenching. For perhaps we may find that, over time, those tight spaces begin to feel more spacious, and we’ll able to dance more freely that we were in our “less-confined” state.

My prayer for you is that you would experience the grace and spaciousness that this day offers to you. God bless you all this Christmas season and here’s to the speedy arrival of 2021!